Day in the Life of an Idiot

 
Image: This is what 58 looks like (on Shawn, anyway.)

Yesterday, no April Fools, was Shawn's birthday. Shawn decide that one of the things she really wanted was a bunch of meals out. So, we started the day at Day By Day Cafe on West 7th in Saint Paul. From there, we made a brief stop to pick up charcuterie (which will be tonight's meal--our family believes in Birthday Week Observed), and then off to S. R. Harris fabric wearhouse for some light shopping. Home for a while and then off to dinner at Bole, which is an Ethiopian restaurant in St. Paul. 

When Shawn was on the phone with one of her brothers, I heard her laugh and say, "Yes, we *do* really know how to whoop it up." 

Maybe this is something about being 58 (which I will also turn in mid-November) or maybe we've always been like this. SPOILER: it's the latter. 

Listen, you don't even understand how boring I am! I got so excited this morning to officially record my first snowfall, it wasn't even funny. But, you know, re-read that sentence. I was excited to record a snowfall on the CoCoRaHS page. I am, in fact, living the high life. 

Today is also Wednesday and I haven't gotten much read. I listened to several of the stories on the audiobook of Queers Destroy Science Fiction, but then kind of petered out on them for some reason. I haven't started the next book, though I did download another option (Please Report Your Bug Here, by Josh Riedel.) Ironically, I also went to the library on the day before Shawn's birthday (when we went out to eat also as part of the week long celebration, this time to--don't mock!--Red Lobster.) So, I have a literal pile of manga I should be reading, too. I just started one that Reactor (formally Tor.com) recommended called Touring After the Apocalypse. (<--pretty excellent so far, honestly.)

Anyway, I need to start getting wits gathered so that I can go pick up Shawn at work. Hope you all are doing well! 

 Mondays are our physical therapy days and Shawn was, once again, a star. Still holding steady at a 128 degree bend, but officially down to 2 degree straightness. Go Team Shawn!

While she was getting put through the paces, I hopped back in the car and got Mason and I some fancy coffee from our favorite local coffee shop. On the way back, I stopped at the post office. Our post office, in its infinite wisdom, is down one outdoor mailbox RIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS. Thus, when I attempted to put my mail into the slot, it actually couldn't go. There were mail pieces sticking out, the post box was so full. I ended up having to park and run inside and put my mail through an inside slot. Crazy! It seems like an incredibly foolish time of year to remove one of the post boxes, considering Christmas is one of the few times most Americans send actual snail mail.

Shawn and I were home for about half hour before we had to take off again.

Unrelated to her knee, Shawn had a neurology appointment scheduled for today. She would have cancelled it, but they're booking out into February (or were when she considered cancelling, who knows how far out it is now?) Neurology, however, equals renewals on migraine meds. And if your name is Shawn Rounds, migraine meds are critical. So, despite having hauled ourselves to PT and back--not to mention Shawn being put through the paces at PT--we dragged ourselves back out into the car to drive to Maplewood (an inner-ring suburb of my city for my out-of-town and international friends.)

We picked up a takeout lunch on the way home.

Immediately after lunch, Mason and I got BACK in the car and got our Christmas tree. 

Now it's just after 4 pm and I feel exhausted. Luckily, we had already decided we'd get delivery pizza tonight. We don't normally eat both meals OUT like this, but it was kind of a crazy day and I think it's justified. 

I have some thoughts on my various roleplaying games on Saturday, but I think I'll make those a separate post.

Things are proceeding apace here at Chez Roundhouse.

At this very moment, Shawn is sitting at the dining room table sorting out short-term disability. This is a very "normal Shawn" activity, so we have, at least, reached the stage post total knee replacement surgery (right knee) where she can concentrate on things that are not solely PAIN MANAGEMENT. I will tell you? A few days ago, Shawn was really not sure today would ever, ever, EVER come.

Yesterday, I was able to be... somewhat of a participant for my bi-weekly podcast recording. I can't say that I was firing on all my cylinders, but I was upright and present and caffinated. That's what passes as close enough these days.

Also in the plus column: I know what day it is: Wednesday.

And, as it happens, one of the things that I've been able to do while playing Personal Care Attendant, is read a LOT of manga.  In reverse order of when I read them:

Telework Yotabanshi/Home Office Romance by Yamada Kintetsu. This was a very cute slice-of-life straight romance that features a Systems Engineer who is... Very Engineer, if you know what I mean. It's very rarely stated in manga, but I feel like if this were written by an American it would just be stated that our main character, Mitsuhashi, is on the autism spectrum. He likes to do things in his very thoughtful way and doesn't like change and isn't especially good at picking up social clues. It's not stated that this take place during the pandemic (possibly to make it more universal and less era specific), but his neighbor also is working at home--she is a perky, out-going  archeology grad student named Izumi. This one-shot follows their romance as it unfolds through various chance meetings, etc. It's VERY RELAXING. 

The Guy She Was Interested in Wasn’t a Guy at All by Arai Sumiko which has a new release from Yen Press this year. It's a yuri, which, oddly, I rarely read in part because.... well, actually the reasons are legion, but among other things, I prefer my romance between adults and so many of these are situated in high school. This one is, too? But, The Guy She Was Interested in... solves one of my other big problems with a lot of yuri, which is that I RARELY find the women in them attractive. Lesbians have a look that isn't conventionally attractive. The heroine in this one is actually dykish and that works for me. Not that this is a "sexy" yuri--so few of them are. It's honestly much more of a coming-of-age story. This manga is on-going, but I read all 100 chapters of it that I could find.

Just Like Mona Lisa (Vols. 1 & 2) by Yoshimura Tsumuji, which I straight-up hated, despite the fact that the premise should have been a gimme for me, in particular. It's a science fiction story set on an alternate Earth where everyone is born without a gender. Some time around 12, most people have decided which of the binary options suits them best and they pick one or the other and grow into that. Our main character, Hisane, is 17 and a half, and is still genderless. This is not a problem for them until their two best friends (one guy and one girl) confess on the same day. I hated this for a number of reasons, but the main one was that we also find out that there is no option for Hisane to stay nonbinary/genderless. All of the others who ever stayed genderless this long died. So it's kind of a "f*ck or die" trope only with gender and I abhor it.

Akane-banashi by Suenaga Yuki (art by Moue Takamasa), Volumes 1-3. If you've read or watched any of  Shōwa Genroku Rakugo Shinjū this is that, only high school. If not, rakugo is a traditional Japanese theater performance style that is basically a one-man show. There are traditional stories that get told and the performer uses nothing but his (or, more rarely her) voice and a simple prop, like a folding fan.  Akane-banashi is a Shounen Jump product and I can't tell if that means that if I watched it, I would eat it all in one gulp, or if I'm starting to feel like a lot of these "my super power is some ancient Japanese artform" manga/anime are starting to all taste the same, as it were. LIke, as I was reading this I very much felt pulled along and it was hitting all the right "she's a genius!" and yet "she must struggle!" notes, but then I put it down and was very...  I feel like I've read this basic premise a million times already.

Then, I read something EXTREMELY smutty called Can’t Think Straight by Pangin (art by Huddak). I've been describing this manhwa to people as "the roommate trope plus enemies to lovers." It's basically about a horribly homophobic straight guy and his gay roommate who through very unlikely circumstances become fuck buddies and then... sort of (at least where it left off) actual boyfriends. This is the WORST example of a redemption arc because the love interest (the straight guy) still has way too much to recover from when the two men are already moved in together and supposedly dating. Luckily, I did not read that one for that PLOT.

A much more adorable and realistic BL/yaoi that I read was That Blue Sky Feeling by Okura (art by Coma Hashii), Vols. 1-2. Okura also wrote I Think Our Son is Gay which is a very lovely story about a mother coming to terms with the fact that her eldest child is gay. That Blue Sky Feeling kind of follows a similar arc where the young protagonist meets the first gay guy he's ever known--a kid who is out in high school and suffering for it--and sort of falls VERY SLOWLY in love with him. (I mean, I am guessing? It is also more coming-of-age than anything else.) Weirdly, this is also a VIZ product, but there's something very charming and original going on here that I quite like.

Two Sizes, Too Small by Mizore is the final one that I read which I also can't entirely recommend. It's about a height gap, which normally I can relate to because I am 5'2" and Shawn is 6'1" but, sadly, this one veered into creepy territory because the smaller one looked very, very... child-like and I had to NOPE out hard once the romance heated up.

So, for me this is a LOT for one week, particularly when sometimes I have to confess to not having read ANYTHING. 

In other--sort of related--news, I lost my Duolingo streak. Ironically, Shawn has been able to keep hers up. My problem has always been that I tend to sneak my lessons in when I am out and about town or in a queue or whatever. Because Shawn is at home, I'm just not waiting in the car for her at the usual times and so I have completely forgotten to even open the app. I think that I bailed at just the right time because some friends of ours and Shawn have been discussing on WhatsApp the fact that Duo seems to have become more menacing and threatening than usual. Anyone else experieince that?

Anyway, that's us. Hopefully, now that Shawn seems to be returning to slightly more normal activities, so can I.

 For those of you who want the tl:dr synopsis/spoilers: Everything went swimmingly. The surgery was a success and Shawn's pre-surgery PT has proven to have been well worth every minute of it.

And now for the whole story, start to present....

( cut for length )

 Shawn is working until 5 pm tonight. This is her last day at work before the knee surgery (T-4 days!) and the bosses are getting their money's worth before she goes on extended leave. 

I've been working through the big list of Things To Do that she left on the piano for me. I've crossed off almost everything, including taking the air-conditioner out of the sun room window (by myself!). Today, I picked up some cookbooks that the Roseville Library had set aside for the history center. While I was out there, I drove through a Free Farmer's Market (Keystone) and I now have a small set of unidentifiable vegetables on kitchen table. I think they are turnips, but, honestly, they might be yellow beets. ID being somewhat hampered because these are not in great shape.


Image: ugly unidentifiable veggies

I did cut one open and smell it. The reason I am going with "could be yellow beets" is, in part, because the interior flesh was quite yellow.  The scent, however, was not distinctively beet (nor ringed like some of the non-red colored beets are when I buy them intentionally at regular farmer's markets), but rather slightly sweet in a way I associate with turnips. To be fair, however, I am not generally a fan of turnips and so I could be completely wrong about their smell.

Feel free to give me your best guess. 

I just got a text from Shawn. The big boss is running even later than expected, so who knows when she'll be able to come home. The thing is, she's the expert on this one thing and so they really want her there as they wrap it up. And, while they could call for advice while she's in recovery, probably you don't want her making important decisions while on OxyContin. Probably. 

The other things I need to do yet today--only one of which is on Shawn's master list--is get postcards to the mail and take the car in for a car wash. We have discovered that this is a luxury we really enjoy, having someone else regularly vacuum the schmutz from the floorboards, etc. I'll probably actually go do those once I finish writing this, if only to get them off the list. If I have to come home and do nothing for a while before turning around to pick-up Shawn that feels better to me than rushing to go get her from somewhere far away, you know? 

Tomorrow is my big GM gig. I am very excited, though a bit nervous because even though this is supposed to be a stripped-down version of D&D 5e, I feel like I need to be prepared to actually PLAY D&D 5e... which is a bit daunting, despite my zillion and a half hours of both playing the game myself and actually watching other (expert) people play it.

Right! I'm off!


UPDATE: I peeled them last night and all of you who guessed golden beets were, in fact, correct! Well done!

 As you all know (since I swear I talk about it constantly), Shawn is having her knee surgery on Tuesday, October 8. What I had not factored into all of this is that my favorite local con, ConFABulous, runs October 11-13. Shawn is still going to be heavily medicated by the 11th. Also, everyone who talks about this surgery--including Shawn's own surgeon--says that the first week is Hell Week. So I think I was being foolish imagining I can attend this con in any way, much less run two games. 

It kind of breaks my heart, but there will always be next year. 

I has made me more determined to get serious about starting an RPG group of my own. So, I guess: watch this space. I would really love a group of folks that would let me try running mini-campaigns in a bunch of different systems. I even found what looks like a really fun, light way to get started in D&D called Solidarity: Drunk Girls* in Bathrooms.

I also had to let my cousin know that Shawn and I are not going down to St. Louis, MO, later this month for her COSA (Counsel of State Archivists) conference. Things have gotten complicated at Shawn's work, plus see above. Shawn is very paranoid (and I think rightly) about picking up any infections too close to her big surgery. Apparently, if the replacement bone stuff they use gets an infection in it, it can be nearly impossible to get rid of--and sometimes the only solution is to REDO the surgery. No one wants that. Plus, Shawn has planned the timing of this perfectly and if the surgeon calls it off, who knows how far out the next available time is, you know?

It's just tough because it is interfering with a lot of the things I love, including road trips!  

But, all these things aren't nearly as important as Shawn health.  And ConFABulous will be there for me next year. COSA will be somewhere else next year, but we can always just plan a trip to Saint Louis sometime! So, it's not all lost. But it's just such a bummer to have to cancel on people.

 The weekend kicked off with... well, not a bang, more of a STAB. 

Before I start this story, Shawn is okay, No stitches were even needed.

On Friday nights it is the tradition at chez Roundhouse to have pizza and movie night. When Mason is off at school this is often date night. But, even when we're all together, I will either make pizza (my family really loves the deep dish I make in our cast iron pans) or we order in. When it's just us, Shawn and I will watch a movie together, but when Mason is home we tend to go off and parallel play--each watching our own things. 

( Not graphic, but still medical.... )

Even though it always feels like forever, we were only there three hours. Not bad for a Friday night! Mason, being the kind of trouper he is, had the house cleaned up and ready for us to just come home and collapse in a heap. 

Saturday we did a very truncated version of our alliterative errands: coffee, cardboard, and cardamom. For those of you just tuning in, Saint Paul provides recycling, but is very picky about only picking up "what fits in the containers." So, we have simply started reserving our cardboard so that we can take it to the citywide recycling center on Saturday mornings. Since the recycling center is near where I like to get coffee, we started this whole coffee, cardboard thing. Once we had two "c"s as part of our errand list, we now insist that anything else we do on Saturday mornings start with a c.  Cardamom is, like coffee, not really an errand, but there is a lovely bakery on West 7th that makes amazing cardamom spinners, so either when we have a lot going on (or, like this last Saturday, NEED A F*CKING TREAT) we will stop at Brake Bread (so-called because it is a kind of drive-up window.) 

Saturday night we had a lovely backyard get together with the set of friends who make us feel Very Grown-up. Do you have friends like this? Like, there's something about this set of couples that is just like Hollywood's idea of hanging out with adults is supposed to be like? There's always this food starting on their big kitchen island that migrates out to this picturesque backyard, with LITERAL fireflies, and bottles of wine.... we love hanging out with them because it makes us feel cool (and they're good company, of course!) 

Sunday we had planned to make the food of Shawn's people, fleischkuekle.  This is an ALL DAY affair. We spend several hours assembling these meat pockets/pierogi and then several hours deep-fat frying them. If you count shopping for the ingredients as part of the process (which I do!) we started at 10 am and ended at 7:30 pm. 

On the other hand, we make literal HUNDREDS of these things.


Image: A small portion of the finished, fried fleischkuekle

How was your weekend? 100% less ER trips, I hope!

 For those of you who have been following the saga I call "Shawn R., Medical Mystery," we FINALLY have a diagnosis that actually covers ALL THE WEIRD STUFF THAT HAS BEEN HAPPENING TO MY WIFE.

Graves' Disease.

What fascinates me is just HOW MANY of the really confusing problems she's been having this covers, including things like irregular heart beats and all of her blood pressure issues. If you go back through some of my tags about Shawn and doctors, you'll see time and time again where something weird is happening and the doctors are all like, "???" 

But, I was talking to a neighbor the other night (our neighborhood is shockingly friendly. My across-the-street-neighbor started a band as a pandemic project and they put on a backyard bash every year to kind of make up for being the noisy house on the block, though I have not been subjected to "Rock the Casbah" six million times since they finished their basement studio.) She was telling me that she had "surprise! Thyroid Cancer!" when she was pregnant with her second child and, as part of that, she discovered that the "normal range" for thyroid numbers is actually VERY broad. So, doctors--many of whom have no more than 15 minutes to scan your chart--will often overlook thyroid as a problem because the number are in the "average" range, but your numbers might be very, very far off FOR YOU. And, so it takes a crisis before they notice how far gone your thyroid is.

Which kind of tracks for Shawn's experience. Her thyroid numbers were in the "sub-clinical for hyperthyroidism" in April, but her GP was like, "Meh, probably doesn't mean much, since it's still THE RANGE and your blood pressure is good." I remember, at the time, saying to Shawn, you did remind him that your blood pressure is being regulated BY MEDICINE, though, right? And, she was, of course, like, "Well, it's on my chart. He must know." (This, however, from the same woman who exhaustively checks prescribed doses and contraindicated medicines because her father was a pharmacist and she just wants to make sure that the doctors are remembering all her meds and that none of them are interacting in a harmful way. But, we all have our things, right?) 

At any rate, this is a HUGE relief for us. I went in with her to see the endocrinologist and we both sort of teared up when he told us that we have an official diagnosis and there is treatment that should actually clear up MOST of these symptoms. He very cautiously said, "Well, the medicine won't take effect immediately--" both Shawn and I, we discover later, are thinking okay, okay, so like six months-- "but you should feel some improvement in a week." And we both almost shouted at the same time, "A WEEK, THAT'S AMAZING!!" 

This was such good news that we actually threw a party. We broke out the sparkling apple cider and ordered a pizza from our favorite delivery place. So no need to be sad for Shawn or express concern. We are ecstatic!

 

Shawn's birthday was on Saturday. We had a fancy charcuterie for dinner. Otherwise, it was the morning after a huge snow storm that dropped nearly 9 inches on us. We managed to still get out of the house to go to S.R. Harris, the fabric mecca, but mostly for simple things like solid colors. (I am starting to plan for a GLBTQIA+ gaming quilt and so needed to be sure I actually HAD rainbow colors around). But, it was a wonderful day, exactly perfect for what Shawn wanted to do. She got some novelty Stephen King coffee cups, earrings she'd asked for and... the piece de la resistance... A PAPER MAP OF MINNESOTA!

We are planning on tracking our regional road trips on it, and maybe framing it at some point once it's all marked up with memories.

Fun times. 

Hope you all had a lovely weekend.

I drove Shawn to her appointment at the Spine Center today, despite the very slippery conditions and snow. While I waited for her, I spent my time in the car checking out the new Duolingo format. (The short of it: I don't hate it. Not sure I love it, but it's fine?)  

She came out all smiles. The doctor she talked to was apparently from California and so they'd ended up chatting for an extra half hour. Those of you from my birth state might be thinking that I am making some kind of jab at you, but my personal experience is that the typical Californian is generally perceived as sixteen thousand times more chatty and friendly than your average native Minnesotan. I realize that not everyone in a state can be categorized one way, but since this is, for me, a positive association, I guess I'm willing to take the heat if people want to argue with me. To be fair, Shawn is used to me and so I think that there's something that other Californians just sense in her--that she will be receptive to the fact that the guy she went to for spinal expertise ALSO wants to talk about archives and history podcasts and Trumpism and everything. I was only sad that I was sitting in the car and not in on this conversation. I suspect if both of us Californians (I was only born there, but SOMETHING stuck) had been in the room at the same time, we would have all ended up to dinner together because that's how I roll among my people. 

The good news is that the doctor feels that some PT and muscle relaxants might significantly improve the problem for Shawn. He also tried to convince her (jokingly) not to think of it as spinal "degeneration," but "age-related wear." To which my clever wife, responded, "Ah, yes, like 'moving through the demographic cycle' instead of aging." 

Okay, back to the kitchen painting grind for me!