Day in the Life of an Idiot

 I disappeared for a bit because I was in the midst of the horrible prep for the colonoscopy (FOR SCIENCE) and the procedure itself.

I would say all went well? But I'd be lying about the prep. I mean, technically everything happened as it should (the doctor even complimented my clean colon!), but that involved a lot of unpleasantries, including the fact that I am of the group, apparently, that barfs. FUN TIMES.

However, science has been scienced.  

Hooray!!

That occupied a lot of my brain space, which is probably good since Daunte Wright was killed by Brooklyn Center police... and my heart is breaking... again. I am so done with this narrative about the warrants out for his arrest, his drug addiction, etc., because you know what? COPS AREN'T SUPPOSED TO KILL GUILTY PEOPLE, EITHER. I don't care how bad anyone is, police aren't supposed to kill. Even if someone comes at them with a knife. Even if someone is high as a kite and biting them in the face. They're supposed to be the one profession that knows how to end that conflict without loss of life. It's supposed to be why we call them. This is supposed to be what we train them to do: bring people to justice, to help them, to PROTECT... not leave them dead in the street, JFC.

Twenty year veterans should know the difference between a Glock and a taser, too. Having done some gun training as part of research for my first novel, I can tell you that most automatics, like the ones cops carry, also have a safety that you have to click "off" in order to shoot it. Bob's gun range also taught me that it is easy to accidentally discharge a gun, so you never pull it with your finger near the trigger. I was untrained and managed to remember that.  If the Brooklyn Center cops are running around with guns with their safeties off and their fingers on the trigger, there is a LOT wrong, beyond the obvious. 

It's just as well that I was hugging the porcelain throne most of Monday and recovering from the procedure yesterday. 

Ugh, I hadn't wanted to dwell on this because, frankly, I don't know what is to be done about it all. I wish I knew. Today, my coffee shop (Cladaugh for those who are local,) is donating all of its profits to the family of Daunte Wright. I bought as many coffees as I could comfortably carry. Feel free to do the same or donate to the Wright family's gofundme directly: https://gofund.me/b101c9ea or any of the organizations listed here: https://www.thrillist.com/lifestyle/minneapolis/how-to-support-the-black-community-in-minneapolis or here: https://www.mnallianceoncrime.org/resources-for-racial-justice-community-healing/

I feel very awkward about posting joyful things right now, when the world is burning for justice. However, I do so in the hopes that someone, somewhere needs a little brightening and that this will help.

My victory garden (take two) is showing signs of life.

Some squash-type seeds have begun poking up after the big (albeit short) thunderstorm the other night. I am no longer certain what these will be. Mystery squash!



Image: baby somethings and a pole preemptively stationed to give them something to ignore, while they trail off wherever they wish.


Image: peas! Including seeds resurfaced by squirrels or birds or fate

I am particularly hopeful for the peas, since, apparently, peas actually like acidic soil. I realized that the reason my previous garden did nothing is because the PINE tree that had been there made for very, very acidic soil. I have since planted with things more likely to appreciate it. Except the squash, I have no idea why the squash decided to sprout.

This is going to be a very chaotic garden this year because in my frustration that nothing seemed to be growing, I also tossed half a pound of wildflower seeds into the ground so god(dess) only knows what will take. We could have poppies growing next to pumpkins next to corn next to bachelor buttons. Victory? Anything that grows in this spot will definitely be considered a victory.

And, lastly, for any of my friends from out of town or elsewhere that had not heard, there is now an official fundraiser for the Uncles (Uncle Hugo's and Uncle Edgar's.) I have not yet contributed because we are waiting for the next pay cycle so that we can give a decent amount, but I suspect this will be a long running fundraiser, at any rate. Here is the link: www.gofundme.com/f/let-us-help-save-uncle-hugo039s

Mason continues to treat his volunteering as a regular job. He gets up around 10:30 am every morning, gets dressed, eats a food, and heads over to Bethlehem Lutheran in Midway where he stays until at LEAST 4 pm, sometimes longer. Last night, he was home around 5:30 pm and informed us that they'd run out of food. Part of why he was late was that there was a last minute call for donations and so he stayed to help sort and organize what came in. They were still looking for more as of 5 pm last night, I linked to their call on my Facebook, but it might be easier to try to contact them if you feel you have things to contribute :https://bethlehem-midway.org/giving/

Looks like you can even contribute money directly to them online, if you are so moved. I always feel weird, as a pagan, donating cash to a church, but if we had spare food, I would consider it. These folks have had a long running food and clothing give-away, so they are very, very committed to good works, which my former Unitarian Universalist self appreciates.

At any rate, I hope you are all as-well-as can be in these times of trouble. It sounds sappy and a little bit useless, but I'm thinking of you all.

Midway is quietly recovering, from what I can tell.

We are out in the streets every day with brooms and paint cans and, in Mason's case, bags of groceries. Yesterday, he spent the first couple of hours packing up food and the last couple helping people load up their cars. He was so cute when he came home, because he said to us, "You know what I learned today? Diapers come in sizes!" Shawn and I were like, "You're ahead of us. We only learned that sixteen years ago!" Because, seriously, both Shawn and I did stints as baby-sitters as kids, but there's so much you don't know until you have an infant in your house. I'm so glad that Mason is learning all this sort of stuff, especially as a young man.

I walked over to to my friend Theo's yesterday because they had painted me a protest sign at my request for me to put in my window.  There was ANOTHER charitable organization setting up a food give away at University and Fairview.  One of the women handing out stuff gave me a water bottle. She was a nice mom-type and when I said I wasn't in need, said, that I needed to hydrate. "It's hot, don't'ca know." 

They seem to be springing up everywhere, because, earlier, as I was coming back from picking up bagels, I saw yet another charity organization organizing a food/medical drive in the empty lot at Lexington and University. So, we are being inundated with help.

My coffee shop, Claddaugh, raised over two hundred dollars in tip jar money for Midway recovery, too. Their tip jar is going to a black artist organization today, I believe.

Meanwhile, in my garden the world continues to turn as though Minneapolis is not burning for justice. 


Image: thin-stalked blue irises in a boulevard garden (you can see the base of our street lamp.)

In the backyard, along the fence, the pink peony-transplanted years ago and so has gracefully agreed to be post-diva stage of transplanting--in bloom:

Image: peonies, still too heavy for their own beauty, flopped over in resplendent despondency.

Finally, specifically for rachelmanija , my orderly rows of radishes:

image: tiny sprouts in a row, nearly overwhelmed by tree detritus, including cottonwood fluff and maple tree 'helicopters.'

On that note, I shall leave you all with the hope of new life. There will be no peace without justice. We can rebuild.

Yesterday, after Mason took his physics test (school is still in session, technically,) he and I grabbed brooms, work gloves, a dustbin, and our masks and headed to the Lutheran church where we normally go to vote. We'd heard people were organizing a relief station there and there were calls for people to help clean-up. The church folks were gathering medical supplies to deliver them to street medics for the continued fight. I stayed and helped organize the food donations to distribute to folks whose only local source for groceries burned (and they have cut off our buses and light rail, so some neighbors are literally trapped without a public transit option to get food and water.) Mason stayed for five hours and kept the medical supplies in order and to put together kits for street medics who are tending people who may be injured in the coming protests.

I could only work for about and hour, myself. Between my asthma and lack of sleep, I couldn't cut it for very long.

Today, Mason is returning to the trenches. He left this afternoon for the church and will be doing, I suspect, more of the same all day.

I just got back from Dreamhaven Books. Dreamhaven was looted last night and was nearly burned, but a quick acting neighbor interceded and saved the store. Lisa showed me a book that started to catch fire, but simply refused to burn.


Image: a partly burned book or, as Lisa called it: The Book That Wouldn't Burn 

If you are local to me, you may want to stop by, as well. They had plenty of help when I was there, but if you are local to me and able to help they would appreciate people stopping by, even just to show support. I brought homemade blueberry muffins, because that's what I do in times of crisis: bake. It seemed to be appreciated. I would have stayed but they were wall-to-wall with able bodies at the moment, and my skills are the sort that I would likely get in the way more than help.

We lost Uncle Hugo's and Uncle Edgar's last night. The building was burned to the ground. My heart is broken for the loss. As I said on Facebook: These were both acts perpetrated by people who are not honoring the life of George Floyd, murdered by police. There will be no peace without justice, but these Nazis need to leave our streets.*

For context, I am not talking about protesters. We are hearing from our governor that of the arrests made last night 80% of the vandals were from out of state. Not just from other cities, but from other STATES. We are being infiltrated by unsavory, right-wing elements who want a race war. The FBI has been called in to stop these white nationalist terrorists. 

We have our own fight to fight, we do not need to be inflamed by outsiders. 

Pray for peace, y'all, but fight for justice.

Yuletide is wrapping up.  My assignments are in and I spent some of the day trying to decide if I wanted to write any "treats."  I can't talk about any of that yet, except to say that in the course of researching some possibilities, I came across this wonderful Ms. Marvel (Kamala Khan) fic:  "Good for Goodness Sake."

I've often stayed away from reading Marvel comics fan fic because I kind of feel like Marvel is it's own fan fic, you know? (Hell it has it's own AUs, What if canon divergences, curtain fic, everything!)   But the author of the above really, REALLY captures the tone and the spirit of the new Ms. Marvel.  It could totally BE an issue, honestly.  In fact, this same author published a fic about Kamala Khan squeeing over the first fic featuring her superhero secret identity (because Marvel is even meta like that, it's CANON that Kamala writes and reads fan fic) and, after I read it, I accused the fic writer of being G. Willow Wilson (the author of Ms. Marvel) because, seriously: nailed it.

Also, it seems like the kind of stunt Marvel would actually pull.

But, they assured me they were NOT the official author of Ms. Marvel.  (Heh, like I believe THAT.)

So... obviously, I'v been working hard on the School for Wayward Demons.  Yeah, no so much.  I did, at least,hack out how the book needs to be structured in terms of chapters. Now, I just have to see if I can make it all work.  I have a feeling Rachel is barely going to recognize this thing when I give it back to her.  I'm planning over the next several days to try to add close to 40,000 or 50,000 words.

Meanwhile, I got solicited for one of SF Novelist's year round up Mind Melds.  I sent my entry in right away, but I haven't heard anything back yet.  I assume it went through and was acceptable.  I guess I'll see if it shows up in the next few days or so.  If/when it appears, I'll be sure to link to it here (and probably all over social media, because I'm that girl.)  

The visit with my folks went well.  We spent a lot of the visit talking about the impending protest at the MOA.  We managed to time things perfectly.  We were leaving the Mall just as the police decided to barricade the East Parking lot.  Presumably their plan was to inconvenience the protestors who were very upfront that they planned to meet up on the east side to move together to the atrium by the Barnes & Noble.  Frankly, I think the police did the work of the protestors for them by doing that.  None of the shoppers could get in or out easily.  If i'd have seen that and had been coming with the intention of shopping, I'd have turned around and gone elsewhere.  Meanwhile, if I were coming to join the protest, I'd have gone to the extra effort to park in any of the overflow parking lots and walked in.  Or taken the train.  Or the bus.  I really feel like the cops screwed things up for the casual Mall shopper, not the focused protester.

So, for all intents and purposes, I'd say it went well for #BlackLivesMatter.  They got good attention.  The MOA and the riot gear cops looked like Big Brother and thugs, respectively, and only 25 people were arrested (out of 3,000, plus god knows how many spectators.)  I also thought that, although for all I know the MOA has no record of racism, the protest focused nicely on the idea that as Americans, we need to stop shopping and pay attention to the sh*t that really matters.

I must have subconsciously wished I was part of them because the morning after I woke up singing "We Shall Overcome" to myself.  I must have been dreaming of joining in.