As of This Moment...

[lydamorehouse]

As of this moment, Loki yet lives. 

I thought for sure he was a goner yesterday, however.  At one point he seemed to shed his entire skin/slime coat.  It was... stringy and disgusting.  Mason looked at Loki and asked me, "Is he rotting alive?"  Turns out, not so much.  I'm now thinking that the medicine I put in stripped the crap off his skin/slime coat, and that might actually have HELPED. 

But with all that gross crap floating around in the tank, I decided I'd better keep changing the water a lot.  I must have done a 25% water change twice since then, and now Loki isn't just sitting on the bottom of the tank but ACTUALLY SWIMMING (albeit hiding underneath the filter.)

So... yeah.  Fins and fingers crossed.

I feel like the worst fish mom ever, but, well, I'm doing everything I know to do.  I think we just have to play wait and see now.  I'm not sure that I will go back to PetCo to replace Thor, though.  I'm thinking they may have brought this horror with themselves, especially since I can't imagine anything left in the tank that could have acted so fast.

I'm also currently avoiding writing.  I'm still stuck on my proposal, but I'm also in the middle of writing some porny bits on my slash/fan fic.  For someone who has technically made a living as a romance writer, I have to say, writing sex is always difficult for me. I get so incredibly embarassed by it.  I had to already write several lines touch typing because I was too flustered to look at the words as they appeared on the screen.  It's weird.  I think part of it  with fanfic/slash is that I know people are going to read this (in fact probably this more than the ones where there's only romance/sexual tension) and I keep thinking, "What if this is only hot to me?"  (Yet, a literature survey has shown me that, no, a lot of people go for what appears to be my kinks.)  Even so, it's like a minature version of the slash reading...  I keep thinking that if I'd had to read something as explicit as Kyell's Road Runner piece, I'd have actually expired from the embarrassment.

Anyway, I should go do something productive.  Either just bite the bullet and write the sexy parts, or plot out my proposal.

Gah.

Comments

[seawasp]

I don't write sex scenes for that exact reason. I won't do it unless it's absolutely 100% necessary for the story (i.e., if we don't see them having sex we miss out on some crucial fact). So far, that's meant I have written one (1) sex scene in all my writing, in the Saint Seiya fanfic "Wild Card".

[kyellgold.livejournal.com]

Oh, gosh, you know, we did a whole segment on the podcast this one time about writing erotica stuff. My big hangup was that I was writing stuff I thought was hot and then people would read it and THEY WOULD KNOW. But it turns out that the people who are reading this are also reading a lot of other similar stuff and they don't really focus in so much on yours except to say that they liked it and it was hot (and then there is sometimes oversharing there too, where I still have to politely nod and say "I appreciate that my writing can inspire those feelings and HEY I THINK THAT GUY OVER THERE WANTS TO TALK TO ME NOW.").

Anyway, practice makes it easier, or at least it did for me. Also pseudonyms make it easier. ;) If you want it to be easier, that is.

(And we are trying to put the video of that reading up but technology is thus far thwarting us.)

[lydamorehouse]

Heh. I can't imagine having someone IN PERSON talking to me at great length about what they found hot in my sexy writing. Did I tell you about how awkward it was when my mother read my romance novel? (Talk about a whole bundle of awkward.)

It's weird enough to have people commenting in AO3, and yeah, it's my psuedonym, but I'm still writing it, you know?

(Curse technology for denying the world the awesome that is our slash!)

[kyellgold.livejournal.com]

I have stood in actual real physical space next to a guy and his mother while she told me how much she enjoyed one of my books (with, granted, not SO much in the way of sex, but still some), and I am not sure if I was more embarrassed for him or for myself. I handled it by blocking out any relevant details of the book in question and just focusing on the cover. She liked the cover. And the dedication. That's nice. I'm okay with that.

(It also probably helps that furry sex exists out of necessity in this kind of fantasy-realm that means I don't actually have to think about real actual people doing things...)