Things Adults Fear, I Guess

[lydamorehouse]

 Continuing the list of "Things That Probably Prove That I Have Never Grown-up," I absolutely FAILED to remember last night in class that adults are afraid of their own dumb ideas. I mean, I'm guessing? But, I suspect that's what happened.

Picture it: there I am writing up my notes for class lecture yesterday.  I feel especially clever because I am organizing my lecture about hooks/beginnings in a 5-W's fashion: Who, What, Where, When, Why (plus How.)  I get to the HOW part and I'm like, yeah, I could list examples of what it's like if you start with an image, dialogue, in the middle of the action, etc., OR I could pop open a whiteboard and see if the students can help me come up with on-the-fly examples.


Image: Class notes, in which I realize, too late, that whiteboarding is a bad idea.

In class, as silence is stretching, I cross this off my notes and write in all caps "BAD IDEA!!"  I totally forgot that I am atypical. Not just of a human being, but especially of a Midwesterner/Minnesotan.  I will totally shout ideas from the back of the Zoom room with zero concern that they be any good. Most adults even when told "no idea is a bad one, let's just brainstorm," utterly freeze up and try to be a small, harmless animal who will no longer meet the eyes of the predator in the room, aka the teacher, ME.

OMG, what a disaster. I mean, at least it was only 15 minutes of excruciating silence and some technical difficulties. 

To be fully fair to my students, some of them did pipe up. Because I didn't require them to actually shout out their ideas, things did appear on the board now and again sort of mystically. It'd be like PAINFUL SILENCE, PAINFUL SILENCE, Me: "Oh, here's one! Ah, this is really good, thank you to whoever put this up... so, um, here's another one from me, I guess?"

But, WOW, it was not the energy building, bonding exercise I'd hoped for. 

I'm learning things! Just when you think you know everything about how to teach, the universe reminds you that, nope, you have to keep adjusting and shifting with each new classroom. 

I will say, though, that thanks to my super organized lecture notes, class went fairly well otherwise. The first half, anyway. I was expecting to need the full second hour of class to teach critique, but it turned out that I either didn't, or was not as good going off the cuff about it as I thought I would be, so we had a solid half hour at the end where I ended up just answering random questions about writing and submitting to agents and editors. I don't think that's terrible, but it always leaves me feeling like I was just scrambling and fumbling by the end. 

At least next class we will be starting workshopping in earnest, so there is hope that I will regain my student's respect after that.

Comments

[profiterole_reads]

Ah, class participation, it's a hard one.

[lydamorehouse]

And it's not like I don't know this! I've been teaching adults for YEARS. But, I swear I've had better luck in the past? Or maybe the silence bothers me less in-person than it does on Zoom?

[pameladean]

I'm not sure you really lost your students' respect. When I was in a situation like that in a class, with nobody volunteering anything and a painful silence, I always felt like a failure as a student, and sometimes most unfairly got mad at other students who were usually able to pull together some suggestions. Engagement was heavily pushed during my entire education, and my inability to enact it most of the time always seemed to be viewed as my own fault.

I mean, you obviously don't really want your students to feel guilty or inadequate -- well, maybe not more than a little? /s -- but a failure to engage isn't always motivated by beady-eyed judgemental attitudes.

P.

P.

[lydamorehouse]

I mean, true enough? I'm certainly less embarrassed for myself than I am for them, but it's such a small group (there are six of us total, including me!) and so I foolishly assumed that might make it easier. Who knows. The minds of adults are well beyond me.

[sabotabby]

Most adults even when told "no idea is a bad one, let's just brainstorm," utterly freeze up and try to be a small, harmless animal who will no longer meet the eyes of the predator in the room, aka the teacher, ME.

Oh no. Just like teenagers. It's awful.

[lydamorehouse]

Well, WHAT'S WEIRD?? I've had way better luck with teenagers and getting them to do exercises like this. On the other hand, unlike you, my classes self-select for a certain type. Loft classes are 1) expensive 2) aimed at the sort of kid who is thinking, "You know what I want to do in the summer? Take a class on writing!" so I mean, the likelihood that my teens are there and ready to roll is VERY DIFFERENT than your teens, I'd imagine.

[sabotabby]

Hah yeah. My kids are forced to be there.

[lcohen]

i'm somewhere between you and your pupils. i was never afraid to supply ideas (and that made me wildly unpopular in school, at times) but i'm not always great at "be creative on demand." i sometimes need to go off and think for a bit. and yet, i was good at improv, so not in every situation--i'm just remembering a particular english class with a particular teacher who wanted us to come up with creative ideas in class and it felt like we would all sit there. i probably would have thought the whiteboard would help, too.