Host(a)ile?

[lydamorehouse]

 On Thursday morning, Shawn and I were headed out to take her to work when I noticed that someone had flung a number of the books out of our Little Free Library. They didn't destroy them, but they were on the ground... in a pile of shredded hosta leaves? Did the person fling the books out because they hated them and then stomped on them so hard they ripped up the hosta??

Then, the next day, I'm taking garbage out when I notice that, in our backyard, someone has broken our "Sit a Spell" bench. It normally sits under our downstairs bathroom window. Around the broken remains, someone had left a Minnesota Wild jersey, both pair of shoes (tennis shoes of some variety), and a gatorade bottle full of... some substance, though it was at least BLUE, so probably not pee? 

And a ripped up hosta.

Someone's psychosis really does not like hosta.

Comments

[naomikritzer]

Yikes.

[lydamorehouse]

Seriously. Definitely goes in the WTF file.

[dreamshark]

That is just weird. I mean, I'm not crazy about hostas either, but I don't go around the neighborhood vandalizing them.

It is irresistible to try to make sense out of the few clues you have, and it does seem like the only common thread in the two incidents is hostas. But there's also the Minnesota Wild jersey - are they a fan of the Wild? (And is this what happens when you name a sports team after an aggressive concept instead of an animal or ethnic group?). Or maybe they hate The Wild, and equate them with hostas?

If it were me, I'd post on Nextdoor and ask if any other neighbors have experienced similar incidents.

[lydamorehouse]

I think Shawn is planning to. I like your wild theory, as it were. It makes as much sense as anything else!

[dreamshark]

It's probably worth reporting to the police. They're unlikely to do anything unless they get a lot more reports along the same line, but you never know. If they actually cared (like it connected to a murder suspect or something) they could probably get DNA off the blue bottle.

[bibliofile]

Seconding the police-report thing, because you never know. Maybe someone finally figured out that you're pagans?

Around here there's always an uptick in vandalism & petty theft when the students start coming back. But we're within a mile of a giant campus (40K students). But you're not near the U (and I don't recall exactly which private school is where in your area...St Cate's, maybe?).

[lydamorehouse]

I honestly appreciate all of your concerns, but this sort of thing is a fairly regular occurrence in my neighborhood. If I forget to lock my car, it is always rifled through, etc. I live in Midway, right near Snelling and University. I don't need school being back in session for an uptick in crime. There is a homeless camp within walking distance of my house, a methadone clinic, and three or four halfway houses. It's just where I live, alas.

This one was notable because of the hosta.

But the police would laugh at us, like they did when someone destroyed our mailbox when we first moved in--which, btw, is actually a federal crime. But, they were like, "Mmmm, uh huh, I need to get to the shooting two blocks way, okay?"

And, at this point we cleaned up all the evidence. It went away with the garbage truck this morning.

[bibliofile]

Oh, right, yeah, nevermind.