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It's Tuesday, so there is a new Tate installment: Bringing Balance and Force in which we learn the TRUE mission of the demon Internal Affairs agents. Dun-dun-DAAAAHHHHH.

There is also new story up on my co-writing project with Rachel Gold/Calish called, "Demons, Demons Everywhere" and is the introduction to the character of Erin.

All of this is late getting to you because my morning was IN-teresting, as we say in Minnesota. I knew I didn't have much time to get everything done because I had to go pick up Shawn by 9:30 am to get to an appointment with our lawyer. We haven't changed our wills and such since being married, so we figured we should get that all taken care of finally. At any rate, I'd just settled in and stared writing when there was a shy knock on the door. I figured it had to be too early for Mormons so I opened the door. I discovered the eldest neighbor kid. He wondered if it would be possible for me to give him and his brother a ride to school. They'd overslept and they didn't have enough cash in the house to pay to take the city bus. I hemmed and hawed, but, seriously... it seemed like the thing to do. So, I ended up giving them and their dad (who, if you have been following along is a genderqueer person named Ebony.) They use the 'her' pronoun, but call her dad. So, there you go.

Ebony joined us because... everything is more fun when Ebony is involved.

As I told Shawn later, the thing that amuses me about every interaction I have with Ebony is that I feel like we could use subtitles provided by Urban Dictionary. Plus, she is so much bolder than me. I have exactly ONE question I want to ask. "What is your preferred pronoun?" It's not a rude question and with her kids in the back saying, "Hey, Dad..." this and "Hey, Dad" that, it seems like I could just pipe up and say, "Speaking of that, do prefer he or she or yo or what?" But, somehow I never manage this.

Ebony meanwhile, just asks all the things, shamelessly.

I ended up telling her all about how Shawn is Mason's birth mom, how I ended up warming up the vial of sperm in my hand during the insemination process, and all sorts of crazy things like that. SUPER personal stuff!

On the other hand, I found out more than I wanted to about their financial situation--none of which actually surprised me (they use the food shelf, etc.) but which just made things a little more awkward (if that's possible?) Shawn and I are very rarely food insecure, but that's because we made a decision in college that we would sacrifice nearly everything to be able to buy what we wanted for food. This is why we have no cable. This is why we don't have an X-box or flat screen TV or more than one car. We dumped all those things so that we can, if we want, buy our bread at a nice bakery and put decent dinners on the table and go out eat and have pizza every so often.

We do the same thing to keep ourselves and Mason in books.

But, we *do* have the luxury of that choice. It's very clear that our neighbors don't.

Ebony, who already works ungodly hours at the Wendy's down the block, is now trying to get a second job for the holiday so they can afford something really nice for Christmas for her kids. I heard all about Nicole's health problems, too. I have a lot of respect for them. They're really working it to make a go of things.

So... that was my morning.

I should pull out the best Ebony conversational moment though:

Ebony: (after learning Shawn was Mason's birth mom) "But he really favors you."
Me: (using internal translator) "You mean he looks like me?"
Ebony: Exactly.

At first, I thought she was telling me she thought that Mason liked me better/had bonded better with me than Shawn, but given my experience with "stud" I decided to double-check.

SERIOUSLY. I need subtitles.

At any rate, I managed all that and got us off to the lawyers in no time. Tonight is going to continue this running around trend because Mason and I have Japanese class tonight AND a new book he's been waiting forever for is out today. So there's a quick stop at Barnes & Noble too. Busy! Busy!
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For those of you who have been following the story thus far, you know I've been painting our fence. This is the fence that goes between our house and the house to the south of us, which is a Section 8 rental. We've been passing acquaintances with one of the families that lives in that house because they have kids Mason's age and are, by chance, also lesbians. Today, while I was finishing up their side of the fence, Ebony (who may be genderqueer/trans because the kids call her 'dad,' though the partner uses 'she' to describe Ebony.) Regardless, Ebony and I exchange a few words about the fence and my work and how I'm mostly painting myself. Then, we have this very... interesting conversation.

Ebony: (somewhat angrily) "You like not working?"
Me: (confused, because WTF, I have a paint brush in my hand. I am clearly working), "What?"
Ebony: "I said, you *like* not working?"
Me: "I have no idea what you're talking about. I have a job at the library, I'm a sub. You might not know that because I work odd hours."
Ebony: "I ain't getting up in your business, but she [meaning Shawn] makes the money, right?"
Me: "Uh... that kind *is* my business."
Ebony: "Yeah, I guess it is. So, you're like the stud?"
Me: "THE WHAT?"
Ebony: "You know, like, the stud."
Me: "The stud? You're hilarious. I wish." [Because at this point, given the context of this very odd conversation, I'm thinking, 'are you thinking Shawn's my sugar mama or something?]

We say a few more random, though friendlier things to each other, and Ebony goes back in the house and I go back to painting, laughing at the idea of being Shawn's 'stud.'

Later it occurs to me that maybe Ebony meant 'butch,'* since s/he's no doubt seen me doing odd jobs around the house. It also dawns on me, while I'm retelling this story to Shawn that maybe the issue is that I also had a very short interaction with Don, Ebony's landlord, earlier. He came by for some reason and--though I tried really hard not to--I overheard Ebony tell Don that they were short on rent and that they'd have to make arrangements to pay him later. Thinking about this, I figure MAYBE Ebony really came over to harass me for my perceived status as 'richer.'

Which I guess, from Ebony's perspective, we are.

I mean, we don't rent, we own. We can very clearly afford groceries on a regular basis. I *do* actually get to stay home more often than not--though if I could find a full-time job that would accommodate Mason's schedule, I'd probably take it (though I do love the library a LOT.)  

So, maybe she was just mad about her situation and poverty in general and thought to harass me, because it seems like I'm doing so much better--and, you know, we are.  No mistake.  But it's a matter of degrees, and the distance between Ebony and Nicole and Shawn and I is not nearly so great as it is on the OTHER side of our OTHER fence, with Catherine and James--James also stays home, because Catherine is a college prof at Hamline and they own not only that house, but rent their upstairs AND own properties in Philadelphia.  They regularly travel to Africa and just sent Mali, their daughter, to a college out East for a summer writing program. They might actually be middle class (it's so hard to tell in America, these days.)  

I also get anger as a response to this.  I've felt it in much less dire situations.  

It was still, possibly, one of the weirdest conversations I've had with ANYONE in a long, long time....

---
Edited to add: 'stud'--d'uh, I should have gone right to the urban dictionary.  Stud is, in point of fact, a word that means butch lesbian.  I am Shawn's stud.  So, as a bonus, we got to be completely crossed-wired despite both speaking the same language and ostensibly from the same culture (lesbian.)

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