Day in the Life of an Idiot

I don’t really have much of substance to report from this year’s WisCON, other than to say that I had a really great time hanging out with everyone there. It was especially cool to finally meet in the flesh Lynne and Michael Thomas, my number one fan xochiquetzl, and reconnect with countless confriends like David Levine and his partner, Charlie Anders and her partner Anne L., Cliff (whose last name I’ve never learned, and see pictures of his fiancée), Warren and Betsy Urbik, Tracy Berg, and, as my local friend Harry pointed out: actually spend time just talking to people I should be able to see every day like all people in the Twin Cities fan/writing community. Plus, I actually met some new people, which is always a bonus.

I have to apologize to everyone who hoped to see me on the Slash 201 panel, but I ceded my seat to Beth Friedman in exchange (I hope) for good con karma. She was one of the people who ACTUALLY got a blank con slate (no computer glitch for her) and she’d been really keen on Slash 201 according to her LJ. I love being on slash panels, but I’ve been granted my share over the years. And, according to Charlie, they used all sorts of phrases I’m not sure I knew: “OC,” etc. Sounds like I’m possibly not ready for the advance level classes. Maybe next year!

So, as for the actual events as I remember them….

Shawn and I dropped little boy off at the grandfolks’ on Thursday afternoon, and then headed for Madison Friday morning. The weather was sunny and cool (my favorite combination, especially for driving).

Shawn and I talked without interruption (wow!) and listened to music on our MP3 player (loudly!) on the way down. I actually thought of a couple of things that I want to add last minute to the latest Tate book. The first is “cow tipping.” I’m sure some of you may have heard that “cow tipping” is a Wisconsin past time. For those of you who have never heard of it, here’s the myth: cows sleep standing up, so reckless youths sneak into the barn late at night to “tip” cows. If you’re from New York you may be asked to participate in this fun event. Don’t be fooled. This is much like hunting “snipe,” a game meant to embarrass city slickers. Cows actually sleep lying down. You can see them doing so in the fields early in the morning. We passed a bunch on our way down to Madison. It reminded me of the time I was asked to go “cow tipping” and was actually led into a pen containing a single “cow.” Yeah, it was actually a bull, and let’s just say my so-called friends found it HI-larious watching me scramble the hell back over that fence. Anyway, I thought it might be fun to have someone from Garnet’s extended family invite Sebastian out “cow tipping” after the wedding as a sort of hazing/welcome-to-the-family joke.

We got to the Concourse hotel way before official check-in, and since we’d asked for adjoining rooms with Sean M. Murphy, we were told we had to wait for housekeeping. I gave my cell number to Ivan, the very handsome in a European-sort-of-way, amber-eyed concierge, and after some fussing around ended up working on the final draft of Tate’s book at Michelangelo’s Coffee shop, where I ran into the WisCON writer’s respite folks which included my former student Gary as well as friends Leah Cutter and David Levine. Since they were clearly all still working, Shawn and I found a quiet table and I plowed through the easy changes. I finished everything that didn’t require major revision by the time Ivan called.

Then I took a shower and the Relaxicon of WisCON truly began. Shawn and I went out to Porta Bella, which is our favorite romantic diner out spot. It’s actually featured in two Garnet Lacey stories, the first of which is the short story “Fire and Ice and Linguine for Two,” and the second is the opening scene in “Dead if I Do” (the book that’s due at the publisher in a matter of weeks). I have to admit that normally, we have had only what I would call “okay” food. We go mostly for the atmosphere, which can be summed up in two words: dark and elegant. It’s really, really DARK in the restaurant and the booths are extremely intimate. This year, however, the food was amazing. I had the goat cheese filled ravioli with chicken and porta bella mushrooms and it was actually one of the best meals we had at this con. Shawn was also extremely happy with the handmade pizza she got. We ate ourselves silly.

Then, we, ehm, went to bed early. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge, say no more, say no more.

Saturday morning was the only day we set an alarm. We headed out to the farmer’s market bright and early around seven o’clock. It was gorgeous. Every year we get three things: two dozen potato doughnuts, squeaky cheese (aka cheese curds), and Amish pocket pies (this year’s choices: strawberry rhubarb and blueberry.) That, along with a café miel from Michelangelo’s, was breakfast. Yum. We strolled a lot and checked out all the flowers and jewelry booths. I made a note that I absolutely HAVE to include the farmer’s market if I get a chance to in later Tate books. Also, I nearly bought a pair of earrings I can’t wear (I’m allergic to metal/nickel and my holes have closed up) because they were made from cool old Soviet coins.

We relaxed (wink, wink, nudge, nudge…) until my panel at 1:00, which was “Endings.” The panel was fine, but I thought it could have been more lively. I blame the subject which really isn’t something a lot of people get really riled up about, you know? Still, I met some new people and agreed to make a book exchange with the moderator (Jim Monroe) who writes apocalyptic, post-rapture fiction, which might be just up my alley.

Shawn and I went to one of the many Indian/Tibetan restaurants for late-lunch/early diner. I had something that nearly rivaled my Porta Bella pasta, which was a chicken, pea, potato curry thing, which I can’t remember anything much about other than “yummy!” (This con was a lot about food for me, it turned out.) We also checked out both of the New Age/Pagan shops on State Street. The one which I base Garnet’s bookstore on is S--, the one just a few blocks from the Capitol, but there’s also a new one a few doors down which we always like to check out as well. We didn’t end up buying much this year (taxes sort of put the kibosh on our usual once-a-year spending spree,) but we did a lot of window shopping. We also had to check out “Soap Opera” our favorite bath shop, and taste test a few of the massage oils.

I ended up going to parties on Saturday night, the most notable being the release party for “Superpowers” a book by David Schwartz, whom I just happened to have met a couple of times here at home – once when I was out being interviewed by Haddyr for the Minnesota Women’s Press, and again when I was dropping off books for WisCON at Dreamhaven. He had a contest for a copy of the uncorrected proofs, which I entered. I am sorry to say, however, that I did not win – as, though I could remember one of the Green Lanterns (amazing given that was a DC question), I flubbed the original line-up of the New Mutants (the only one that came to me was Sunspot, and then after that I drew a complete blank.) I was truly mortified, but as the winner had already gotten a copy of the book, I got it as a consolation prize. Turns out Naomi Kritzer really wants to read it, so I’m going to give it to her first (since I’m such a slow reader, with my dyslexia and all.) I spent much of the rest of the evening feeling deep shame at having been shown up on a Marvel Universe question. Captain America would be so ashamed of me!

Then I danced with some really cool women, whose names and identities are lost in the haze of too much Mike’s Hard Lemonade. We did the Hustle and the steam shovel and should have nailed the dance contest, but I think that died before it had a chance to start (a dance contest at a science fiction con? Can anyone say high school all over again?) I suspect it got more exciting later.

I drifted toward the Tor party as I’d promised Xochiquetzl that I would “flit” with her and jiawen (as well as meeting up with Charlie and Anne). The Tor party being the Tor party was overcrowded and hot, but I managed to stay and shout at a few friends until I met up with Xochi and the others. I had a great conversation about “The Wire” with former panel-friends from Chicago/Think Galactic, whose names I’ve also spaced on (too much alcohol, damn it!) Plus, I got to chat with former Loft students Tim Mulcahy and Gary (argh! No last names in my head!!) However, it was much good times.

Though I tried to tell Shawn I needed to go attend Sean M. Murphy’s panel on Clichés and Tropes on Sunday morning, she reminded me that I had some revisions to finish on Tate’s novel, so I blew him off in favor of writing. I’m happy to say, I got everything done. The only thing left to do is let Shawn read the final, final draft and then it can go off to the publisher this week! Hooray!

After I finished up the draft and we checked out of the hotel, we stopped by the dealer’s room, and finally had a great conversation with Lynne and Michael Thomas (who had previously found our meeting “anticlimactic.”). I also met Chicago fan/editor Steve (Schwartz? Damn surnames!). I also got to catch up with Warren and Betsy Urbik near their jewelry booth. Xochi joined us, and, as Shawn always calls it, I “held court” for a while, which I secretly always enjoy.

Shawn I left early, missing out on much of the stomach flu glory, though I seem to have had a touch of it this afternoon. I hope all of y’all are doing okay! We dutifully washed our hands early and often and used antibacterial lotion at every turn. Though I was sad to leave before the con was over, it was good to get back to LaCrosse and hand with my folks and Mason. We heard about the tornado that struck close to St. Paul and were anxious to get back to see if the kitties and fish were okay!

You couldn’t even tell there’d been a storm nearby as we came into town. The papers showed houses smashed to splinters, and I thought for sure we’d see downed trees. But, this morning when I was out digging in the dirt to plant seeds, the ground was even dry and hard packed. I don’t know if it even rained here.

However, I should say that everyone was fine, even the new tetra. The kitties had snarfed all their food and looked mournfully at us when we came in, but somehow they survived on those “jungle pouches” of theirs. Most of the plants in the new tank survived, too, though my favorite one got quite yellow. Hopefully, now that the grow light is back on full-time, it will make a recovery. The tetra tank had also lost about a gallon of water to evaporation, but otherwise they seemed no worse for wear. We still seem to have our snail castaways as well.

So, how about you? How was your con? If I mentioned you but flubbed/forgot your surname, feel free to correct my drunken haze! I’d love to be able to say “hi!” next time we meet and remember your damn name.