Fun and Funerals

[lydamorehouse]

First of all, for those of you who tune in for writing tibits, I posted this morning over at SFNovelist: When Writers Don't Write. And yes, I was thinking of pegkerr, who has never, in my opinion, stopped BEING a writer in any sense of the word.

This weekend was really quite pleasant. For once, Shawn and I had nowhere to go. We happily wasted Saturday playing video games with Mason and napping. On Sunday, our friend jiawen came over for brunch. I had such a blast making all sorts of treats for her: bacon, scrambled eggs, pancakes, and potatoes with cheese. Mason chattered on about "Luxor 2" a game that comes standard on a lot of computers. He's really into it -- as are Shawn and I. It's not terribly complicated. The idea is to "blow up" a chain of balls (kind of like in Centiped) by making chains of three or more of the same color. You have a little scarab beetle that you use to "toss" the balls. But, Mason really loves "adventure mode" because you follow a map that has themes and place names. He thinks it's pretty special, but has a tendency (like all us geeks) to sometimes just start talking about things without providing any kind of context. I'm sure he'll baffle grandma and grandpa Morehouse this weekend.

We've decide to let Mason sit out the funeral in Indiana. Before you get up in arms, hear me out. Mason has a double handicap. Not only is he four, but he's also not being raised Christian. A LOT of what happens in a traditional funeral is going to baffle him. Plus, there's going to be a second ceremony that he *will* attend. Shawn's dad had, during the course of his life, two wives. One, Shawn's mother, who died when Shawn was fourteen, is buried in a double plot in Grand Rapids. Pat (Shawn's dad) had decided some time ago that he wanted his ashes split between Shawn's mom and Margaret (his "new" wife.) Shawn and her immediate family (her brothers and their spouses) are planning a spreading of the ashes ceremony in Grand Rapids some time this summer. I think that this ceremony is going to make a whole lot more sense to our little pagan. He's heard a lot already about the cycle of life -- how the seed becomes the plant, which bears the seed... etc. Because it's going to be a lot less formal, he'll be more able to take an active part in the ceremony, too. I think this is a really good compromise.

Plus, with Mason with grandma and grandpa Morehouse, I'll have a chance to focus on saying good-bye to Shawn's dad too. Otherwise, my attention is always going to be on Mason. Let's only pray that the pastor doesn't read that crazy-ass story of Lazarus. I freaking hate that story, especially at funerals where it's especially creepy.

In the meantime, can I just ask? What's up with the universe? Several people I know have had an incredibly crappy month of March. I've sent more condolences cards this month than I ever hope to again.

Comments

[hutch0.livejournal.com]

I think that's an eminently sensible decision regarding Mason and the funeral. I remember attending my grandfather's funeral when I was about the same age and being utterly bemused by it. Which, of course, is probably why I remember it at all.
March was up and down. Mostly down, the past week. April not looking much better. Mustn't grumble, though.

[holy-toledo.livejournal.com]

I think the no funeral thing is a good call. All there would be is a bunch of old biddies staring daggers at him if he dared make a peep.

-Mel

[technocracygirl.livejournal.com]

Formal funerals at the age of four, no matter how much the kid is steeped in the appropriate indoctrination, are going to be horribly confusing. Not that it means much, but I think that you guys are doing the right thing.

My sympathies to you, Shawn, and Mason.