The Clumsy Gardener

[lydamorehouse]

 
Image: Purple lilacs beginning to bloom

I have a new theory about my life as it relates to the garden/my yard. I may have already mentioned it, but it really seems to be shaping up to be true of the whole season, not just isolated days. Gardening is easy for me, every OTHER year. On the OTHER year, which this one is... it's just sort of... clumsy. 

Like today, I went out to check on how my garden was growing and water some of the things that I've planted in spots that tend to stay dry, even when it's rained a bit (ie under the eaves of the house.) While doing that, I tripped over my hose twice AND nearly pulled a plant up by dragging my hose clumsily around the corner of the house. 

I tried to trim back the mock orange so that I would poke myself in the eye every time I came around the corner and managed to snap off a branch that was still very healthy by accident. ARRRRGH.


Image: Virginia bluebells blooming in the garden

After watering some of the oregano I am trying to grow in some bare spots in the yard, I managed to slip in the mud an unearth one of the oregano bunches that I've had to replant SEVEN TIMES because the f*cking squirrels keep pulling it up. (Those little b*st*rds have been unearthing my bulbs, too, and because many of them are daffodils, they taste them, find them yucky, and just leave them to rot.)

That's not to say that the garden isn't thriving on its own, without my help. The lilacs are starting to bloom and the Virginia blue bell that I transplanted a couple of years ago has never looked heathier. I could not be more pleased with the bulbs I planted last fall. Thanks to the cool weather we've been having, several of the daffodils that survived the squirrels are still fully blooming. All of my trillium bloomed and it looks like the jack-in-the-pulpit is coming back strong, as well. 

It's just that I feel like when I go out there with the best intentions I make thing worse?

My only comfort is that I've had some pretty excellent EVERY OTHER years, and so the back shade garden is shaping up into something quite lovely. The peonies that I transplanted that are supposedly notoriously finicky to move around are thriving.  The thing that's making me crazy of course, is that when I see this success, I think, OH, I should do more of that. Let me just dig up this... and then because this is an off year I RUIN EVERYTHING. 

I just...

I guess this is a year for me to just leave everything ALONE. 

Image: A classicly drooping strand of pink bleeding hearts

Easier said than done, of course. One of my great pandemic joys has been putzing around in the garden. I spent much of last year reorganizing various spots, halving hostas, and such like. I'll just have to remember that any endeavor like that this year should be entered into with the foreknowledge that everything could die. So, I will try to remember to only attempt this in places where I really doesn't matter if I screw it up. 

Sheesh.

At least, right now, we have some sunshine. The weather here in Minnesota has been very weird. Colder than normal temperatures, plus overcast days. Like, the sun will be out in the morning and then a cold cloud cover will roll in and just mute all the light and warmth. I can't say it's been my favorite, even though I am normally a huge fan of slow, cool springs.

Comments

[sabotabby]

I've decided I'm too depressed to garden this year. I will plant a few things to stop soil erosion from getting worse but I don't need to add "plant murderer" to the long list of things I feel like shit about. I hope you have better luck!

[pameladean]

Your photos are lovely. I'm sorry you are having an OTHER year; it seems unfair after a whole pandemic one.

I have tried so many devices to prevent the hose from strangling plants, but nothing ever completely does prevent it, and sometimes I've definitely felt as if the more I thwart the hose, the more doggedly it decides to really do in a particularly cherished plant when it finally figures out how to get around my arrangements. Also hose guides seem specifically designed to trip up the unwary, which, despite efforts to pay attention, I almost always am.

In my opinion, mock orange bushes are profoundly perverse and like to annoy the gardener by letting go of good branches and committing other shenanigans; but they enjoy being perverse way too much to ever die.

P.

Well!

[lsanderson]

I have completely given up on gardening! I now only feed the squirrels, the yard bunnies, and the slugs -- and I am an expert at it and everything is now a great success! Something even carried off two full lemongrass stalks! (Something nothing has ever touched before.) And I get to admire the thrilling monochrome blue-green of the tulips instead of the garish colors I used to have! And I am introducing them to ever new things to consume.