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[personal profile] lydamorehouse
This morning on my local country-western radio station they did one of those "phone in your opinion on X" things, and today's topic was about "marriage insurance." Apparently, there's a guy out there who is advocating the idea that couples who get married should, sometime right after the honeymoon, start saving for divorce costs (not pre-nup stuff, but lawyer fees, etc.) He pointed out that apparently it is much, much more likely that a married couple will get a divorce than for their house to catch on fire, and people take out insurance on their house. The statistic they quoted was that fifty percent of all marriages end in divorce.

I wanted to call in and say, "You know what? Fifty percent is pretty crappy odds. Clearly, you straight people should not be allowed to get married." I then also wanted to brag that my partner and I have made it together for twenty-one years. Defend against that!

Then I had this science fictional thought. What if someone did just that? What if our powerful (yet fictional) GLBT cartel decided to get medieval on their asses, legislatively-speaking, and pre-empted all this "Defense of Marriage" crap by proposing a bill into Congress stating that you can marry anyone you want (regardless of same or opposite gender), but you get one chance to marry. Pick a person and stick with him or her, or you get life in jail.

I'm absolutely sure that with enough combing a person could find Biblical quotes to support the idea that you pick your mate for life or you rot in hell. I'm sure Leviticus has something about it (probably some stoning offense). Forget that Jesus was never married (hell, most of that particular brand of Christian likes to forget that their Lord told them to forget every other commandment in the Bible, but this: "Love your neighbor as yourself." He did not suggest you pre-screen your neighbors or only live in the fancy ones in the suburbes. He meant, in the words of Bill and Ted, "be excellent to each other" and meant even the gay ones, I know this for a fact, because he tells the parable of the good Samaritan.)

Honestly, the thing that bothers me the most about all this hoopla about gay marriage is that these people who can't stay with someone half of the time, seem to think that me and my twenty year relationship is some kind of threat to them. Sounds to me, like the biggest threat is themselves. (And to all you nice straight people out there, I don’t mean you, unless you're a Defense of Marriage sort, and then I do. Times ten.)

But even more importantly, the truth is about money. I should think that any decent Republican would support gay marriage. Despite sharing a house, income, and a child with my partner, I am taxed as a single person. My accountant has to do a lot of crazy juggling that I'm fairly certain would be fraudulent if we were allowed to pay taxes like a married couple. The government is screwing itself out of income because it wants to make sure I'm not some kind of drain on private business' resources when I'm covered by my partner's health insurance. Very W. Worry about the minor scratches when your jugular is bleeding out.

Not that I'm a bitter lesbian.

Happy taxes due day!

Date: 2006-04-17 07:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] oneminutemonkey.livejournal.com
Hmmm. You go one way...
Me, I'm envisioning "marriage insurance" as the next hot thing. I mean, you pay people money on a regular basis 'just in case' anything happens to your house or your car, or in case you die... I've heard of surgeons insuring their hands, singers insuring their voices, models insuring their body parts (though don't quote me on that), so how far-fetched would it be for people to have "marriage insurance policies"? Though the logistics are still eluding me. Massive payout if you remain married for 50/60/75 years or until death? Hmm.

Actually, I do like your idea more. You think people would be a lot less likely to get married if they knew it was a one-time deal, with no escape clause?

Oh, and definitely kudoes on your relationship lasting so long! I'm always amazed when I realize that my parents are still together after 30+, my wife's parents are still together, both of her sets of grandparents remained together until one or both died, and my father's parents stayed together until one died. (My mother's parents separated, with one living in Virginia, one in Washington State, but they still spent like 6 months of each year together as long as they were capable of traveling... one or the other would go home once they were tired of being together.) My wife and I have been together 10 years and still strong. So the point of this lengthy digression, and I'm sure I had one, is that I'm all in favor of any sane relationship where two adults can spend their lives together. It sets a good example for the rest of society.

(The jury's still out on that whole 'listening to country=Western radio station.. just kidding!)

Date: 2006-04-17 10:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sausconys-books.livejournal.com
Congratulations on being together 21 years. My parents only made it to one third of that. I've been with my now-spouse for 10 and a half years, but we have only been married for a few months. People kept telling us that living together wasn't like being married and eventually we would break up and our biggest worry would be what CDs belonged to whom. We've been re-defining marriage for ourselves and we've faced a lot of pressure from society, parents, friends, and family to just be like everyone else. Sometimes I think it's not just that the US has a problem with gay marriage, it's that it has a problem with any marriage that doesn't conform to the "ideal." I didn't change my last name to his when we got married, nor did I hyphenate it and I get harassed about that all of the time. But I think it's worth it to live my life my way, even if I go through hell. I think everyone should have the freedom to live their lives their own way and marry who they want to marry, regardless of sex, color, religion, etc. I'd just like to live my life in peace and have other people treat me with the respect and privacy I afford them.

BTW, I'm still collecting my thoughts on my meeting with Wen Spencer and I'll send you an email soon.

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